Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Letting Go of Fear & Perfection



Hello friends!  I have been absent here for quite a while. Fall has seem to snuck up on me and it has come and gone... although here in Florida doesn't seem much like "Fall" at all, let alone Winter now.

I haven't written much lately because I never know what to write about and I feel like it will never be "perfect" to share with everyone.  Yet, I'm realizing that that is not what this blog is about.  This blog is just about me sharing my imperfect life with you-- grammatical errors and all.

I also haven't written anything because I can never decide on a topic.  That's something I struggle with- indecisiveness- and I need to work on this! I couldn't decide whether to write about the Holy Spirit, the huge problem of Nominal Christianity, how God has revealed Himself to me as a Father who actually FEELS, or Forgiveness.  All of these are too hard to choose between!  I'll just touch on some things...

I have been learning so much this past month.  God has been working on my heart and He is teaching me to trust Him and let go of so much I have been holding on to.

On that note-- Peter and I have decided to come back to YWAM after we are finished with our outreach to the Middle East.  I don't know what that will look like exactly, we are still praying for direction.  Yet, we know we are supposed to be here.  I have no idea how this will work financially... but God spoke to me and told me to just keep going back to the last thing He has told me, and the last thing He told me was to come here, so here I will stay until He calls me elsewhere!  He has been telling me to face my fears, and that is what I will do.

I want to live a courageous life for Christ.

I've also learned that God has a Father's heart.  Not like fathers here who have come so short of being perfect, but a Heavenly father who truly understands us.  He's a father who is always here for us, He cares, and He feels our pain and He experiences our joy alongside of us.  He is a Father who has the biggest heart towards His children and He always protects, provides, and loves on us (sometimes in ways we don't quite understand, or in ways we never notice).  I feel so blessed to have this perfect Father in my life.  I've yearned for this aspect of Him my whole life, and He has revealed to me that He has always been a Father to me and He will never disappoint or leave me.

My eyes have also been opening more and more each day I am here.  I explained to Peter just this morning that it feels like I have had scales on my eyes and God has had to gently peel each layer back in His timing and in a way that I can handle it.  I am outraged at some of the ways I have been viewing this world and it angers me how I have done nothing about so many injustices.

God has told His people to GO; to GO to a hurting world and to stop thinking our comfortable lives are more important than HIS calling.  The church is not meant to COME, we are meant to GO.  We come to church, come to bible studies, come to so many events... but when are we GOING?

Go to the lost
to the sick
to those who are poor in spirit
to those who have never heard of Jesus
to those who are different than you
to your enemies
Love them.

These are just a few things that have been on my heart, but it doesn't even touch the tip of the iceberg.

God is working on so many aspects of my heart and I am so grateful for that.  I have a lot of learning to do, but I know that I don't ever want to look back.  I want to keep running this race and going to those that are hurting. I want to learn how to love more deeply than I've ever have and to actually experience the heart of Christ.  This is what I want for my life, and I hope that it is reflected in these words, no matter how grammatically incorrect they might be.

Love you all!
Steph

Sunday, October 13, 2013

Outreach to the Middle East



Middle East-- here we come!

Bringing the light of the gospel to the hardest and darkest of places... this is what we were born for.

We are so excited to be going to the Middle East in January for two whole months! Peter and I prayed for a long time for the location of our outreach and what the Lord would have us to do, and He has clearly called us to go to these people.  I know that while we are there we will learn SO much about the people, the culture, and we will see the GREATNESS of our God.

Why the Middle East? Not sure, but I know that if we don't go, we would be in disobedience to God. And I fear that over fearing anything and anyone else in my life. I want to follow Jesus wherever He leads me, and to not sway away from that, even if that means going to a place where so many people fear because it is "unsafe" or "corrupt".  This is WHY I am a Christian-- to shine Christ's LIGHT into DARK places! This is what we were made for. Oh, and yes we are being wise about what we are doing and where we are going there.  We have some amazing leaders taking us!

Also-- the people here are so receptive to the Gospel, and they want to know who Jesus is.  Reminds me of the verse where Jesus says to His disciples, "The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field". -Matthew 9:34-35.  This is why we are going.  We will also be teaching them English while we are there, so we are helping them in a tangible way that will be useful for them in their everyday lives.  I can't wait for this! I never imagined I would have this opportunity.

Why go on missions in general? Because seeing God in these other nations, makes my view of Him GREATER, not smaller. He gets the MAXIMUM GLORY.

It makes me more aware that God is working in the hearts of those in other nations, and not just my own.  It makes my view of myself and my home country so much less inflated.  It reminds me that God has called every one of us Christ-followers to GO and proclaim the Gospel to every nation, tribe, and tongue.  We are all a family in Christ.  And if we don't do this, if we are not obedient to the calling He has on our lives, then how can we say that we truly love Him?  Just something that I've been thinking about.

I have great conviction of this in my heart, and I am praying diligently that others would too. Missions isn't just for some of us, it is for ALL of us.  And usually, when you reach other nations, you not only "bless" them... you get so much more blessing in return.  It's incredible. God wants us to serve Him in every aspect of life; to get out of our comfortable houses and our comfort zones; to let go of our insecurities and to let down our walls, and FOLLOW HIM.  Won't you listen?

Sunday, October 6, 2013

Set My Heart on Fire - YWAM Week One!




Long over-due post!  So we are finally at YWAM Orlando!!!  This picture is of the lake that is on campus, it is beautiful here. God has truly been so faithful to me and my husband through this whole thing.  Fundraising the money, making new friendships, building upon old ones, and reaching out to our community... it's blessed us SO much.

God has set our hearts on fire for Him.

I've never hungered for God this much in my life.  This week in DTS we've learned about 'Hearing the Voice of God' and it's blessed us both so so much.  We have been hearing from Him in ways that I never realized were possible and I wish I had learned this so much earlier in my walk with Him.

The other morning during my quiet time, I really heard from God personally.  After I was done praying and reading, I just sat still with Him.  I asked Him what He thought about me, and then I listened. I truly listened and didn't dismiss it as "my own voice".  I had faith it was His.  He longs to speak to us, we just need to be willing to listen!  And you know what?  He answered me!  He said I am loved, cherished, and beautiful.  Just the words I needed to hear.

Oh, how He loves us.

I am so humbled at how much I have realized that I DON'T know about God.  There is SO much for us to learn!  It's crazy how much we have been learning this first week of school and we are so excited to learn more and more.  We've been meeting really awesome people in class, on street corners, and in coffee shops.

This time has also been hard for me.  I am realizing how I have a very skewed view of myself and who I am.

A misconception of self.

God is working on me.  He is working on how I relate to people; learning how to trust others again.  I am learning who I am IN HIM-- not in my definition of myself, nor the worlds'; I am who GOD says I am.  No one else.  I am loved. Redeemed. Precious in His eyes. His daughter, who is greatly loved.  He has truly set my heart on fire and I am so ready for more of Him!


Thursday, August 15, 2013

What Do I Do with My Life?





What Do I Do with My Life?


That used to be THE question.

All through high school and college I would constantly question myself as to what job I was going to have.  This inevitably led to stress and anxiety about my future.  It made my life one big headache.

I just didn't know what I wanted to DO with my life. I was consumed with this question and some of my family would frequently ask about it as well (out of love of course, but it didn't make it any easier for me).  But who says a JOB is the meaning of life?  Who says a job is the most important thing to figure out, and if you don't, you're a failure?  And the big one-- who says a career defines your worth? I don't understand! What about BECOMING the person you were made to be? Not just having a good career...

It all boils down to money and security, especially living in America. Why do we yearn for security so much? Why is that what life is all about?  If I had to choose between a solid, stable, well-paying career or a not-that-great-paying job with a life filled with wanderlust, joy, and contentment without all the STUFF, you better believe I'd choose the latter.

After intently searching for my dream job, changing my major three times, applying to numerous different programs at many different schools, I came to the conclusion that life is so much more than just yearning for those things that do not have any eternal worth.

Recently I quit my well-paying job and sought what God has for my life.  And yes, I am grateful that I worked there because it enabled me to pay off my student debt I accrued while I was searching for that perfect degree and career.  Ironic, huh?

But as for my life now, I am BECOMING more of the person that God has made me to be. I don't worry about what I am going to DO with my life, God's got that. He has a plan.  Recently, I've had more time to seek Him more diligently and give my heart rest in the mere fact that I don't have to have all of it figured out. Surprisingly, I'm at peace about it. I am filled with joy!

He's revealed to me what my life purpose is! I guess you're wondering what that is?

To follow Him. To trust that He has me every step of the way.

That's it.

And day by day, He gives me a new little glimpse into my destiny. I think I can 'kind of' see what my future looks like from a distance... but that's like trying to look at a train close up (thank you Pastor Brian for this analogy!)  All I see are the box cars flying by me and it takes my breath away.  I can't understand my life from this close up; only God can.  God can see the whole train from above and He sees my life, your life, from beginning to end. And THAT is what I am trusting in.

Coming back to destiny... quite honestly, my destiny is heaven.  I rest assured in that.  While here on this earth, my role is to proclaim the gospel that brings salvation through Jesus Christ to every single nation, tribe, and tongue.  This is the work that Jesus has started and I'm here to continue it.  What an amazing destiny God has planned out for those who love Him! So I encourage all who are reading this to cling to the hope that God has given us and to stop worrying about 'what am I going to do with my life?' and 'I need to have a solid career to be successful'... just trust that God has a bigger plan for you.  Pursue Him and everything else that you need to do in this life will follow suit.

Uncovering Hope one piece at a time, and I am SO enjoying it :)

Love, Steph

Thursday, August 1, 2013

Stepping Stones- update #2


Update part 2!

As we move closer and closer to our departure date to YWAM, I am excited to announce that we have hit our goal of $7,400 for our tuition fees!!

Only $5,600 left to go!

That means, we are now solely raising funds for our Outreach in January.  We can now pay for our tuition!

We still need your help and we still need your prayers.  We will be fundraising up until December.  Please pray that people's hearts would be moved to help us.  I haven't got any action from my PayPal account either, so please be aware that that is always an option to give as well :)

FUNDRAISING EVENTS-- Photo shoots!! Having mini-sessions all day with Becky on Saturday! Can't wait to see everyone there! Check out her blog, here.

And also, a YARD SALE! Be there or be square on August 10th from 7-1 at 6228 Seal Place, Waldorf, MD  20603 in the Hampshire neighborhood (we will be directly on Hampshire Circle across from the townhomes).  We are collecting donations for this event, if you all have anything you would like to get rid of!

**If you have received a letter in the mail, please get those back to me by August 8th so I can have a feel for what we are looking at in the next couple of months.**

ALSO!! We really do need monthly sponsors for our trip.  We honestly have drained a huge chunk of our savings for this, knowing God will provide for us. Please pray about sponsoring us while we are at school. We still need the funds for personal care, laundry, snacks (cause we all know Peter and I both are bottomless pits), and weekend gas money.

Thanks for keeping up with us :)

Love, Steph

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Stepping Stones - PayPal account link & an update on YWAM funds!



$5,500

That's how much we have raised for YWAM!! Thank you to all who have helped :)  Either by donations, helping with fundraising events, and/or your prayers.  Y'all are so awesome!

That means, approximately only $7,500 left to go! I know God will provide for us, in HIS timing.

Pay-Pal Account:

I finally set this up!  Find the "Donate" button on the top right side of this page if you'd like to  contribute.  You do NOT have to have a PayPal account to donate; PayPal's fees are 2.9% + $0.30 for each transaction (taken out of the donation).  You will not pay any fees for using this service.  This PayPal account is solely for YWAM funds; it is not tax-deductible, but a quick, easy way to give nonetheless!


Tax-deductible donations:

For tax deductions, you can give to us through our church:

Potomac Heights Baptist Church
37 Glymont Road
Indian Head, MD  20640

(check to church; our names on the memo line).


These are just our stepping stones, taking one day at a time... trusting God in each and every step.  There is so much freedom living life like this.  Sometimes I get caught up in trying to have the whole picture figured out, but in this, I just can't.  I  can't even pretend to be in control of this situation (or of my life for that matter) anymore.  It's out of my hands, and whatever God wants to do with me, He can!  I feel safe in this place :)

I will continue to give updates on our journey; thank you for keeping up with us!  Please continue to pray for our faith, trust, hope, and funds.

Thank you guys!! <3

Friday, July 12, 2013

Change of Direction


Sometimes God changes our course slowly, or rather abruptly.  For me, He did both, all at the same time.  He has given me a change of direction.

If you've been keeping up with me, you know that Peter and I were planning on going to a missionary training school in Australia. And if you know me, you know that I have at a pretty good, secure, decently-paying job. Yet-- all of this has changed in the past couple weeks.  I've prayed, sought advice, and have cried over these two things in my life.  One that has brought much joy and the other that has brought a lot of pain.  Then, I heard God quietly whispering to me...

'You can quit your job now.'

'You won't be going to Australia.'

.....What?! God, why now?! Why didn't you tell me this BEFORE I applied to YWAM in Australia? Why didn't I quit my job six months ago?!


The job prayer was answered slowly, and the Australia prayer was answered pretty quickly.  Still, I wrestled with these thoughts and with God.  Deep down inside though, I was relieved.  This was God answering my prayers of bringing me joy, peace, and provision.  After looking back on these decisions, I know that I had God's approval and His blessings on both of them.  And quite frankly-- that's all that matters.

Concerning Australia, maybe this just isn't God's timing.  We've decided that we are going (God-willing) to YWAM in Orlando, Florida instead.  I am truly excited to go to Florida, especially since we can come home for Christmas! After all, Australia would have been insanely expensive-- God's answers to our prayers (financially in this case) are quite simple sometimes, if only we would listen.

As for my job?  I thank God that I had it, and I thank Him that I am no longer there as well; it provided a way for me to pay off my school loans and to meet some pretty awesome people.  For a long time, I loved my job and I didn't mind the commute that much.  But then my heart started changing, and I started having an uneasy feeling in my soul, deep down that I just couldn't shake.  So, I had to make a change.

I hope I made an impact on each person there, I really do miss them already.  I hope they saw the light of Christ through me; I hope that I brought Jesus into their lives; I hope they turn their lives over to Him (and in some cases, to continue to fight the good faith and endure until the end, and I will see them all again)... but that's in God's hands, not mine.. and I'm at peace with that (to all the ladies there reading this-- I love you!)

My decisions caused concern for some people (especially since I was quitting my job and have no other job in sight lined up), but I have to remind myself of 1 Thessalonians 2:4 that says,

'But just as we have been approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel, so we speak [and live our lives], not to please man, but to please God who tests our hearts.

I always seem to try to plan out my life, but God always comes along side of me and wrecks my life for the better. 

His answers caused a wrestling within my heart that caused both fear and undeniable joy.  I choose to fight for the joy and to abolish the fear in my heart-- and I encourage everyone reading this to do the same.  Don't live your life in fear, it is from the enemy who wages war against our souls.  God wants what is best for us, and He brings an all-consuming joy and rest for our souls.

Looking back on this past month, God has been nothing short of amazing. I can't express everything I'd like to that is on my heart in this post-- it would never end.  I just hope that God is being honored and glorified by my life and that people would see that I am not trusting in the comforts and security of this world.  It does not last.  The only things that last are those things that cannot be seen; the eternal.  This is why I live my life the way I do.

God bless you guys, and live your life to the fullest, in honor of the one true living God; we only have one chance to do so.

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Here Am I


Here Am I, send me!


Alright everyone, this blog post is long overdue but I am urgently writing this in hopes that God would move in the hearts of those that read this to give to our mission of spreading the Gospel to those in Australia and in Asia!  We are praying for a support team.  We need to raise $19,700.

Yes. You read right!  $19,700 <<< This is no longer the price, since we decided to go to Florida instead of Australia! Florida DTS is only $13k :)

This is impossible for us alone, but with our GOD, nothing is impossible!  We need YOU to be the hands and feet of Jesus in our lives right now, with support in the form of prayer (and LOTS of it!), spreading the word, encouraging us, and with your funds if God moves in your heart to do so! Only with our friends, family and community surrounding us in those areas of need, will we be able to make this possible.

We will be hosting a slew of fundraisers this month (and for the months to come) including a yard sale, bake sale, parties, car washes, and maybe even a concert! ;) Peter will be doing drum lessons as well. Please let me know if any of these things interest you!


Total length we will be gone= 6 months.

Yep! 6 months! October 21 - April 4. That means quitting our jobs, selling our stuff, packing up, saying goodbye to everything and everyone we know (including our precious kitty!) and heading halfway around the world to learn more about Jesus and make Him known!

Peter and I have felt strongly called to go into missions at this point in our lives.  With YWAM (Youth With A Mission), we will be doing a DTS (discipleship training school) for 3 months in Whitsunday, Australia and our missionary outreach will be in Asia for another 3 months. 

We know from the bottom of our hearts that this is God’s will for our lives; we can’t deny His call about this.  Our prayer is that God would move in the hearts of those that read this to give to God’s call that He has placed in our hearts.  Will you be a part of this with us?

We have been leaning on God’s truth that He WILL provide for us.  I KNOW He will.


Truth #1: I serve a God who provides beyond my faith.

“And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.” -Philippians 4:19

Truth #2: I can't do this without you. Yes, you there reading this blog. I need you!

“The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body. So it is with Christ.” -1 Corinthians 12:12


God has given us YOU to partner with us!  He wants you to share in the adventures of living out of faith (and not by sight) with us.  If you feel a tug on your heart to help us, please don’t ignore that call.  We have only received a few promises from a couple people that will be supporting us (and THANK YOU guys!!)  So far, we only tangibly have what sits in our savings... and that’s not that much!

Let me introduce you to some truths that God has laid on my heart from His Word:


“Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, ‘Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?’ And I said, ‘Here am I. Send me!’” -Isaiah 6:8

He is sending us to share Him throughout the nations!

WHY are we going? Here is a little fact that really got to me:


There are over 2,700,000,000 people who have never heard the Gospel at all, and there are only 5,000 to 7,000 missionaries worldwide who work directly with these totally unreached groups of people. That means there is approximately only ONE missionary for every 450,000 of these people!


Jesus was not exaggerating when He said, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.” –Matthew 9:37-38

Will you help send us?


Here is how you can specifically help:

Prayer: Pray for us as we make this leap of faith, raising funds, trusting in God, and being filled with all joy and peace as we faithfully follow in the footsteps of Jesus.  Pray Ephesians 6:19-20 over us: “Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.”

Encouragement: Peter and I both need encouragement as we stand boldly in truth that God will provide for us-- anything from text messages of bible verses, a short call with words of wisdom, blog comments, and even Facebook posts that lift us up and encourage us as we walk daily with God and have our faith tested.

Financial Support: Please pray about this! If you want to make a donation, please let me know.  We are currently setting up a final meeting with the leadership board of our church to see if we can have an account with them so that any donations we receive would be tax-deductible (looks promising, just need to work out a few formalities).  As of right now, if you were to give, it would be straight to me and Peter and we have an account for our YWAM funds.  Please either comment on here, or email me at stephotis@yahoo.com for mailing information.

One-time donations and monthly donations would both be wonderful!   Any amount AT ALL would be a HUGE blessing to us!!


Breakdown of due dates (for both of us, total):

DTS (Australia):  <<< This installment is a DIRE NEED right now, these due dates are getting close!

Sept 23- $1,400

Oct 1- $7,300


Outreach (Asia):

Nov 11- $4,000

Dec 25- $4,000


Other Expenses:

-Airfare to and from Australia: approx. $2,000

-International Health Insurance: up to $1,000

-Monthly expenses while in Australia & Asia: approx. $100-200/month


Thank you for taking the time to read all of this, it means SO much to us that you are taking an interest in what God is doing in our lives.  He has been so amazing to us, and I can only hope that you continue to stay throughout this journey with us and see God move in some amazing ways.  We hope to make God known throughout the nations with our lives, and this is just the beginning! Please pray about becoming part of our support team—we need you!  Love you guys!!

http://www.ywam.org/
http://www.ywammedia.com/ywamwhitsunday.com/dts.html

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Walking by Faith, Not by Sight



Do you know that God has AMAZING plans for your life? Plans you could NEVER dream of?  And the best part? He gives us all we need to accomplish these plans in our lives, along with grace, hope, and peace.  He gives us the strength to carry out His will for our lives.  He gives us REST when we need it the most... He is our greatest comforter.
 
 “My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord.
    “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.
For just as the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so my ways are higher than your ways
    and my thoughts higher than your thoughts. –Isaiah 55:8-9

 
“I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid. –John 14:27

Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see. –Hebrews 11:1
For we walk by faith, not by sight. -2 Corinthians 5:7

What’s the catch?  Faith.  We can only live out this amazing life God has planned for us, if we live it out by faith.
 
Faith is ‘the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see’.
 

Let’s look at Hebrews chapter 11...
3 By faith we understand that the entire universe was formed at God’s command, that what we now see did not come from anything that can be seen.

6 And it is impossible to please God without faith. Anyone who wants to come to him must believe that God exists and that he rewards those who sincerely seek him.
7 It was by faith that Noah built a large boat to save his family from the flood. He obeyed God...
8 It was by faith that Abraham obeyed when God called him to leave home and go to another land that God would give him as his inheritance. He went without knowing where he was going... Abraham was confidently looking forward to a city with eternal foundations, a city designed and built by God.

This chapter goes on to show the immense faith of those who believed in God’s promises: Sarah believed that God would keep His promise and bring her a child, Abraham was ready to sacrifice his son because of the immense faith he had in God, Jacob blessed his children because of his faith, Joseph proclaimed that the people of Israel would leave Egypt, Moses left Egypt not fearing the king’s anger, and finally, Rahab protected the disciples and in doing so, was not destroyed with the rest of her people in her city who refused to obey God.  These people showed great faith in God, without being able to SEE how everything was going to work out for them.  They believed; they trusted.
 
God, let us trust you with this kind of faith.

I love verse 27!  ‘It was by faith that Moses left the land of Egypt, not fearing the king’s anger. He kept right on going because he kept his eyes on the one who is invisible.’
What faith Moses had to not even care what the king would do to him, but to just continue to trust in the one true GOD.

It then goes on to explain what feats people made by having faith in God, and also what consequences they had to endure for doing so.  Even though God has set before us an amazing journey doing His will, it WILL cost us... and sometimes, the cost is our lives (whether that be giving up your own plans for your life, or giving up your physical life).  Is it worth it to you?
All of these people did these things BY FAITH.  It was by faith that they lived fully for God and were blessed beyond measure.  The following were the characteristics of these people of great faith:

  • followed God’s call solely by faith not knowing where they were going
  • sacrificed for God and gave him acceptable offerings
  • lived righteous lives
  • pleased God
  • believed God exists and that He rewards those who sincerely seek Him
  • their actions showed they served Him
  • confidently looked forward
  • believed God would keep His promise
  • agreed they were foreigners and nomads here on this earth
  • always were looking for a better place, a heavenly homeland
  • they were not afraid
  • chose to share the oppression of God’s people instead of enjoying the fleeting pleasures of sin
  • suffered for the sake of Christ
  • kept their eyes on God
  • obeyed in the midst of terrifying circumstances
  • obeyed and followed God even when no one else could understand
Do any of these things portray the type of faith that you have?  Why or why not?  What can you do to become more like these great pillars of faith?  And remember—all of these people had struggles, made mistakes, and had major weaknesses to overcome.  Yet, their weaknesses turned to strength through their faith.  Let us who claim to have faith live out our lives like this! Don’t miss out on God’s blessings and plans for your life because of disobedience or fear.

God has amazing plans for your life (and mine, too!)  Don’t be scared to take that step, to listen to that still, small voice, or to respond to that little tug on your heart.  Just because you can't "see" something happening or it doesn't make much sense, doesn't mean it isn't God's will for your life.
Don’t delay; respond to God in faith today.

Thursday, April 4, 2013

What Next?


As my heart gets heavier and heavier, I feel compelled to write.  Lately, I have been contemplating my current situation.  I want to be in the center of God’s will.  I want that more than anything because I know that when I am focused on God; when He is #1 in my life; when I truly am seeking Him... then that is when I am in the center.  I am in the center of my God’s perfect will and that is where I can find all the fullness of joy.  This is what I want in my life: joy.  I want peace and a passion for life.  I desire to give myself to the work that God has planned out for my life.  God says that He knows all of our days.

Psalm 139:16 reminds me, “All the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be.”

This gives me hope.  Hope that God is in control and He KNOWS my entire life.  And right now... I feel like it’s come to a fork in the road.  Whether that means that I need to completely change my course, or if that means I need to stop and wait for direction, I don’t know.  I guess that’s what God means when He says to trust Him.  Trust that He will guide us in the right direction in His perfect timing.

His perfect timing.

This is the question of my life—what is God’s timing?  When do we know when God says... “Okay, this is next”.  Is it some secret point in our lives that when God says “go” you better get your butt moving and go?!  I don’t think so... I’m slowly realizing that God WANTS us to know his timing.  He WANTS us to know His will and to seek Him and to KNOW that we are pleasing Him with our lives.  This is the epitome of His love for us—that He promises that He will never leave us nor forsake us.  That He will guide us, protect us, stick by our side, and have our backs even when no one else does.

I guess this is just my struggle right now. I want to know so badly that what I am doing in my life is pleasing to Him... and maybe that’s right where I need to be.

Maybe standing in the midst of not knowing my future and not knowing what’s next is where God’s perfect will resides.

Maybe not having everything figured out and living the perfect, cookie-cutter, American-standard way of life is how God wants me to live my life.
Maybe, JUST MAYBE... this is what He would want from all of us.
Do you have joy and passion in your life? What you spend the majority of your time doing... is it using the gifts that God has given you to glorify Him with?  Are you being all He created you to be?  And in return, are you finding peace and joy in those things?  Or is your life just a constant cat and mouse chase of making more money, getting a higher degree, or buying the nicest house or fanciest car and hoping that ONE DAY you’ll be able to say that you are “set” for life?  What does that even mean?!

Is your life spent constantly worrying about your future, trying to figure out every single step of the way, and not trusting that God has it all in His hands?

These are the things that have been on my heart. These are the things I know are my struggle.  So what if I don’t know my future?  So what if I don’t have the best job in the world or make the most money or drive the nicest car or even own a home?  What is home anyway?  Aren’t we supposed to make heaven our destination and this world just a temporary place where we can spread His name while honoring and glorifying Him in the midst of our circumstances?  Isn’t this world just a constant coming and going of life events that either make us or break us?  What is our purpose?  What is this life for anyway?
Having a great job?
Having a nice house?
Having a college degree?
Having a perfect family?
Being the healthiest, most active person?
Being perfectly in style and up-to-date with fashion?
Owning the newest smart phone and having all the apps humanly possible?
Looking like you have it all together?
And if these things are the reason for living... what fulfillment is found in them?
My heart has been so heavy lately because I see myself being pulled toward this world and frankly—this is NOT my home.  I am yearning for God to teach me to just TRUST.  Trust He has me.  Trust He will work things out.  Trust He has something absolutely amazing in store for my life... so much more than it is right now; so much more than I can think of or even imagine; a life that radically shows that He is God of all; a life that honors Him and fills me to the core of my being... and not forgetting to be thankful during this time of waiting.  He has my life and my heart and He will guide me and won’t let me mess everything up.  And He promises to do this in the lives of those who love Him... so that means you.  He will help you just like He is helping me through this journey.  I am just looking for His direction and waiting on His timing.

So, I guess the next question is—“Okay, God... what next?”

All Sons & Daughters - 'Called Me Higher'

Saturday, March 30, 2013

Clean Eating




On my journey to taking care of myself, I dedicated a large portion of my time to reading more about how to live a healthy lifestyle.  This led me to understand more than I ever have about food.  I started learning about how terrible processed foods are for your body, and I have actually realized how horrible they make me feel.  Also, my lack of exercise had been contributing to some intense mood swings and a general feeling of being "down".  So... here are the things that I have learned and that I am trying to following and incorporate into my eating habits:

·         Eat 5-6 small meals every day (breakfast is the most important)
·         Eat every 3 hours
·         Always combine a lean protein with a complex carb at each meal
·         Drink. More. Water.
·         Plan & prep your meals; not planning = failed meals
·         Always avoid over-processed, refined foods
·         Avoid sugar-saturated juice, alcohol, and especially sodas
·         Depend on more fresh fruits and veggies for your nutrition:)
·         Portion control!
You obviously can’t eat 6 meals a day unless they are “smaller” than the huge, standard American three meals a day looks like. SO. This means smaller, more controlled meals every 3 hours that include a lean protein with a complex carb.

Plan & Prep
Plan your meals for the week.  This helps when you have JUST gone grocery shopping and can prepare (prep) for the week.  Always, always wash and cut all your fruits and veggies right when you get home from grocery shopping and bake anything you need to (like amazing, healthy sweet (or purple) potatoes that should be a huge staple in your diet).  This helps you to not have to prepare each small meal during a busy work week.

Portion Control
5-6 small meals a day.  YES, eat more often! This is basically how our bodies ‘should’ be telling us how to eat... but society and a huge lack of portion control has made us all unaware of how terrible we are treating our bodies!  Here is the correct portion sizes you should be eating at each meal:


Yea… society def. isn’t following this… but should be!

Healthy Staples
Always try to get your food closest to it’s natural state as possible.  This means less processing and less loss of nutrients. Try to avoid white flours, sugars, etc.

  • honey (my #1 go-to sweetener)
  • agave nectar (found near peanut butter or in baking aisle)
  • 100% pure maple syrup (not “pancake syrup”)
  • truvia/stevia packets (natural sweeteners found in baking aisle)
  • stevia drops (found in health food stores)
  • brown rice
  • quinoa
  • chia seeds
  • flax
  • oats (quick or old fashioned)
  • coconut oil (instead of butter or canola/vegetable/olive oils)
  • almond milk
  • bananas
  • greek yogurt
  • egg whites (usually use a whole egg and then extra egg whites to bump up protein in recipes)

Helpful Sites

Examples of food prep


  • hard boiled eggs
  • sautéed zucchini and squash (I add tons of herbs to mine)
  • steamed broccoli/grilled asparagus (or any veggies)
  • baked sweet potatoes (super good for you!)
  • a crock pot recipe/casserole recipe that will last you a while 
  • whole coconut for the antioxidant water and grated flesh for recipes
  • chicken breasts (plain or in a recipe)
  • greek yogurt and frozen fruit in baggies for quick smoothies (add in fresh baby spinach leaves, honey, ground flax seeds/chia seeds, and almond milk)
  • brown rice/quinoa/whole grain pasta
  • baked spaghetti squash, ground turkey, and red sauce (for a super healthy spaghetti meal)
  • cut up all of your fruits and veggies to snack on throughout the week
Me and my husband usually prep every two weeks (since we are on a budget and just have to make it last a while right now) and make a trip to the grocery store in between for fresh produce.

Typical day of eating in my life

Breakfast- Oats with whole milk, honey, 1/2 banana, chia seeds, and flax; OJ; coffee with homemade creamer

Mid-morning snack- greek yogurt, mandarin orange, green tea

Lunch- lean protein and complex carb. For example-- sweet potato, chicken, and zucchini. Or maybe just PB&J and hard boiled egg... and water every day at lunch.

Afternoon snack- whole wheat muffin and a banana

Post-workout—protein shake and maybe another muffin (sometimes I usually just eat dinner if we are going directly home from gym)

Dinner- Turkey meatloaf, asparagus, zucchini, and milk.

Dessert- greek yogurt, cottage cheese, almond/peanut butter, & granola on top (maybe.. I usually don’t want a meal after dinner unless we had a really tiring gym day) **note—do not eat this if you are not working out regularly.  This is high calorie and high fat, which I need because I sometimes have trouble eating enough throughout the day.

And that’s my day! I don’t eat perfectly each day and I know my downfall is not planning/prepping enough so I am working on that! I know planning a week’s worth of meals seems like a lot but if you just have a couple hours one day a week or so to do it, it’ll save time in the long run. But if not... just try planning one or two days at a time!
This way of eating has definitely made a difference in my energy and how I feel in general. A book that has helped me tremendously is The Eating Clean Diet (it says diet and fat loss, but it has good tips in general for just a healthy lifestyle): http://www.amazon.com/The-Eat-Clean-Diet-Recharged-Lasting/dp/1552100677/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1360605805&sr=8-1&keywords=eat+clean


Also-- I can’t stress enough how imperative exercise is. Exercise strengthens your immune system and positively effects your emotional responses to everyday life.  Strength training is specifically important because it boosts your metabolism and continues to burn energy while you are resting (while your body is repairing itself, building muscle).  Don’t leave this part of healthy living out of your lifestyle!

I hope this information helps! For more recipes and tips, visit my Meal Plan board on Pinterest for inspiration: http://pinterest.com/stephotis/food-tips-meal-plans/
My Instagram feed also has a lot of my recipes I've personally made too: http://instagram.com/stephanieotis/